The Donor Search and The Three Brothers...
My youngest brother Daryl, despite thinking he was giving me his kidney, was not even considered as, on his questionnaire, he stated he had prior kidney stones, which is an immediate disqualification.
Testing began with my oldest brother, Neil, who also felt, as oldest brother, it should be him donating a kidney. All testing was going great, he was a blood match (O which is universal), and a good antigen match. Then things slowed, partially due to COVID. The testing process can take up to 4- 6 months and from my end, sometimes feels like watching paint dry. It’s a lot of sit back and wait. Wait for the requisition for a test, wait for an appointment date, wait for the results, and wait for doctor to call with next steps. If something is even the slightest questionable, they ask you to redo the test and the process of waiting begins again.
Some of the tests include blood and urine, ultrasound of abdominal area to ensure all other organs are ok, chest x-rays and stress test to ensure no heart issues, etc. As my friend said, it’s like having one of those expensive comprehensive health examinations at private facilities like Medcan (around $3000) but this one is for free! I also had to go through thorough testing to determine that I am a good candidate to receive a kidney. One test actually found polyps in my gallbladder which have subsequently been removed.
Anyways, long story short, Neil, got to the very end of the testing and was declined. The doctor felt his kidneys were just not strong enough to remove one. I’m not sure who was more disappointed, him or me……..
My brother wasn’t just donating a kidney because he “had to”. He wanted to. There is a difference. He wanted to be the one to save his little sister’s life. Even six months later, he still feels he should have been the one. There was never a feeling of “I got off the hook”. His giving was truly genuine.
So two brother’s down, next in line was my middle brother, Glenn. Testing again started off great (blood and antigen match) but after jugs full of urine, he too was declined as his uric acid levels were too high.
That was a very sad day for me. Not only were three brothers declined, but I would never have a family kidney in me. I would have been very proud carrying around one of their kidneys, sharing something that special.
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